#intolerable tweets

[lvndrptchwrk]

haikyuu cursed tweets i made (i also post these on my !nsta if youd like to see more of these cursed tweets its lvndr.ptchwrk)

[ninyard]

ABOUT LACTOSE INTOLERANT ANDREW. sorry i saw it and got so excited because while i don’t think im intolerant i do have Some sort of issue going on… with milk…. but anyways i tried lactose free milk for the first time while visiting family and it was so good like i can actually eat cereal or have a glass of milk if i want to without feeling like shit the rest of the day ALL THIS TO SAY. the monsters only start buying lactose free milk but they CANNOT get nondairy ice cream. andrew just refuses <3

Like personally I’m a big oat milk guy. I’m not lactose intolerant per say but I can be sensitive to having too much dairy so I’m glad that I just honestly prefer oat milk in things because it’s just nicer to me tbh

But can you imagine someone trying to hand Andrew some lactose free cheese. If Andrew asked anybody in his life to bring him back some ice cream and they brought him back some lactose free ice cr**m he’d never speak to them again. I think he could tolerate the milk if the others refused to buy normal milk but there’s no way he’d go out of his way to buy alternatives for himself.

If they went out to a restaurant and someone told him not to get a starter because it has cheese in it he would go on to order a glass of milk with his main alongside the creamiest carbonara to ever exist followed by an ice cream sundae the size of his head. Andrew Minyard will NOT be told what to do (and he will severely regret it later)

[akkivee]

i don’t know what this meme is but i laugh anytime I see it LOL

[fakerottmnttwitter]

And there's 1 (one) toilet

Op:

Me I guess, but in reality, all kudos to my lactose intolerant friends who give me inspiration (they would in fact kill me if they read this, thanks supreme pizza in the sky they don't have tumblr)

[msburgundy]

maybe people genuinely don't understand this so i will just say, "substance abuse" is a behavior. addiction in the chemical sense is developed much later.

[marionberry-jam]

got excited to eat mac and cheese and said oh boy time to make my tummy hurt!!

[myattman]

hm

[enkvyu]

two-faced — jjk smau

in which gojo pisses off a famous streamer (you 🫵) for funsies and unleashes a legion of loyal fans who want him dragged, doxxed, or dead. fortunately for him, you have your own secrets that you’ll take to the grave, perfect for him to take advantage of. when the two of you meet, an unlikely love story for the ages blossoms aka a lighthearted smau abt gojo n the gang!!

pairings: gojo x f!reader

genres: social media au (smau), crack, fluff, strangers to enemies (?) to lovers

warnings: profanities, dark humour, sexual jokes, mentions of death and suicide, very stupid jokes don’t take anything too seriously!! ignore timestamps. will contain jokes / references from the manga !! you will be warned of spoilers on the posts that have them 🤍

this is my first smau so if it’s not funny i Apologise 😨 just for the shits n giggles !! upload schedule will probably be based on how well this is received 🤍 note all characters are in uni (ages 18-20)

unread notifications !

profiles one | profiles two

01: hit tweet this, hit tweet that, why don’t you hit the gym?

02: hot girls pay the government 2 b a citizen

03: nanami’s right titty tingle

04: What Ever Major Loser

05: let him in, LET HIM IN

06: it’s “save the turtles” until i drink boba with my hands

07: silence of the lambs

08: god giving me my greatest obstacle and it’s a man

09: would u still love me if i was a chip floating around in ur stomach?

10: deny that instead

11: twitching eyes and clenched fists

12: getou’s bang grease

13: spring loaded penis bomb

14: first date options and gojo picks spit boba (it works?!)

15: lactose intolerance, biggest killer since cancer

16: unknown mysterious reason unravelled

17: i wish i could have at least (1)

18: beautiful princess disorder

19: GOGOGOJO GONE !

20: tba

pinned accounts !

@whats-humanity-lol @vduxx @saltypuffin1040 @porridgesblog @justpuddinglol @sleezzsister @fadingpalacebonkpsychic @iluv-ace @realestalphamegathugd4ddy @invisible-mori @mimiqz @hyuckworld @wheredidmycrowngo @ericupid @satorukissr @rumi-rants @milza12 @nymphsdomain @thunderimpulse @waengyknow @err1vki3 @nerdiel-has-no-braincells @whatamidoing89 @aboveasphodel @doughnuts-eater @archer-fb @giannitaa @leathernourishingshoepolish @poisonnuggies @cotton-eee @postmancat @yoontaedotin @crushed-satellite-stars @polartrident @starsfilm @etsukis @bladeismine @the-fab-killjoy @a3th3rrr @alatuskaleidos @emii4evr @trcomedump @usermins @ancientimes @aelynaneedsalottathing @jaynawayna @milceslv @lvryeager @sukisprettyface @kissezfornamjoon @satoryaa

couldn’t tag account (make sure your settings allow u to be tagged!)

( being added to the taglist means you will be tagged at every new release ! ask 2 be added / removed 🤍 )

[mariacallous]

Assailants firebombed a synagogue in a Montreal suburb for the second time in just over a year, the latest in a series of attacks on Canadian Jewish institutions since Hamas’ Oct. 7, 2023, invasion of Israel.

As in the other recent attacks on Canadian Jewish sites, no one was injured in the incident.

Mordecai Zeitz, the emeritus rabbi at Congregation Beth Tikvah, a modern Orthodox synagogue in the suburb of Dollard-des-Ormeaux, said the congregants met for morning prayers on Wednesday morning outside the synagogue.

“We were able to recite the morning prayers in an abbreviated way,” he said.”We did not close even if we had to go outside to avoid the fires on the inside, but we had the fires of Jewish identity and Jewish pride very much front and center, in front of the charred doors of the synagogue,” Zeitz told the Jewish Telegraphic Agency.

Police told the Montreal Gazette there were no injuries and that witnesses reported seeing a suspect at the site prior to the arrival of police. The building suffered minor smoke damage in addition to its front glass shattering.

Assailants tossed a firebomb at the same synagogue in November 2023 just weeks after Hamas’ invasion, which launched Israel’s multi-front war. There have been a number of similar attacks on Canadian Jewish institutions since then, including shots fired at Jewish schools. In August, bomb threats were sent to dozens of Jewish institutions across Canada.

This week’s attack also comes after a violent pro-Palestinian demonstration in Montreal in late November where protesters burned Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu in effigy. And it comes roughly two weeks after an Australian synagogue was firebombed.

Zeitz said the damage was limited to the shattered glass and to the vestibule, and that he expected services to be held inside on Wednesday evening. The synagogue was inviting non-congregants to attend a solidarity Shabbat service on Saturday morning, he said, noting that the day school attached to the building had stayed open and functioning.

“We are never out of business,” he said.

B’nai B’rith Canada called on the authorities to do more to stem the violence.

“This is a terrifying reminder that Montreal is increasingly unsafe for Jewish people,” the synagogue’s cantor, Henry Topas, said in a statement.

“This is the result of the failure of leaders at all levels to hold accountable those responsible for the hate and violence that is infesting Canadian society,” said Topas, who is  also B’nai Brith Canada’s regional director for Quebec and Atlantic Canada. “Specifically, Mayor Valerie Plante must act now to stop the exponential rise in hate and antisemitism which she has permitted to get out of control in Montreal.”

Plante and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau condemned Wednesday’s attack and vowed to track down the perpetrators.

“This vile antisemitic attack against Montreal’s Jewish community is cowardly and criminal,” Trudeau tweeted. “I trust the perpetrators behind this hateful act will be quickly brought to justice.”

Plante wrote on social media that “antisemitic actions are criminal actions,” adding, “It is intolerable that citizens of Montreal should live in insecurity because of their faith.”

[tearwolfe]

lactose intolerant ibs tsukasa tenma Send Tweet

[turn-my-hollow-purple]

Tweeting with AOT

Idk why so many of these are milk themed bruh I’m lactose intolerant

[meangirls-imagines]

Welcome to the Poly!Plasticsverse!

collab with: @yungpoetfics (my fav bubs in the world)

Regina George

@queenbgina/@callmereginald (she/her)

North Shore's Queen Bee

Soft for her girlfriends

The mom of the group

Basically a sugar mommy for her girls

Lifehack Geek

TikTok hater

Has rational fear of werewolves

Will fight a bitch

Victoria's Secret girly

Female rapper stan (Doja, Cardi, Megan, etc.)

Gryffindor

Lesbian

Gretchen Wieners

@thegretchenw/@greatgretsby (she/her/it (only if ur special))

The second mom of the group

Softest human

Loves playing with her girlfriends hair

#1 Twilight hater

Has a letterboxd account just to leave bad reviews

The level headed one usually, but will snap when she needs

Cuddly as fuck

Loves Fleur du Mal lingerie

Stubborn as Fuck

Wine drinker/expert

Loves vintage music (Elvis, Elton John, etc.)

Hufflepuff

Bisexual

Karen Shetty

@karebearz/@karensheetty (any pronouns)

Ambidextrous™️

Loves Spongebob

Plant Parent

Knows Britney Spears and Lady Gaga choreo

Kpop girly (Blackpink, BTS, etc.)

Lettering expert

Has Funko Pop collection

Squishmallow lover

Ravenclaw

Pansexual

Cady Heron

@cady_heron/@defnotcaddy (she/her)

The third mom of the group

Whispers when angry

Carries bandaids at all times

Always has snacks

Lactose Intolerant (but LOVES cheese)

Cries at Rom-Coms

LOVES hugs

Cannot handle spicy food

Sleeps with a teddy bear

Happy to be here

Friends with everyone's parents

Token vanilla of the group

Has diary (with a heart shaped lock)

Bisexual

Aaron Samuels

@aaronsammy/@atomicaaron (he/him) or (ho/mie)

1/3 of Terror Trio

Y/N's best friend

North Shore's resident Himbo

Will do anything if someone says "I dare you"

Impulsive buyer

Has one brain cell (shares it with Y/N)

Overuses 💪 emoji

Usually confused

1/2 Golden Retriever duo

Can skateboard

Uses Axe body spray

Co-founder of Stuntmares

Dreams of grabbing a teddy in a claw machine (bucket list item)

Ass man

Owns too many grey sweatpants

Kisses his homies (homiesexual)

Has never watched Harry Potter

Watches lifestyle coaches on YT

Can play the ukulele (really badly)

Loves Eminem and Harry Styles (would fuck Harry Styles)

Writes Larry Stylinson fanfics

Kissed Y/N once (regretted immediately)

Bisexual

Damian Hubbard

@hubbarddamian/@damianishubby (he/him/they)

Learned how to sew from Janis

Does drag and has a YT channel (Anita Dick)

Huge Adore Delano stan

Will fight anyone who hurts Janis

Doesn't like Rupaul as a person, but is a religious Drag Race fan

#1 Poly!Plastics fan

Has an 8 step skincare routine

Cameraman for Stuntmares

Earlybird

Lies about having curfew to go to sleep early

Ravenclaw

(Lowkey wishes he was a Slytherin bc it's the "cuntiest house"

Him and Karen watch The Bachelor

Fav movie is Dirty Dancing (did the lift with Janis)

Learned how to twerk from Y/N

Gay

Janis Imi'Ike

@janiisimiike/@imiikenough (she/they)

Secret Barbie girly(live action and animated movies)

Will go straight for Ryan Gosling

Feral chihuahua of the group

Hozier stan

HATES THE KARDASHIANS

Pain in Regina's ass

Anger Issues™️

Secretly loves Olivia Rodrigo

Mentally Ill friend

Emotional Drunk

Karaoke Queen

Tits girly

Leather Jacket lesbian

Getting piercings > therapy

Has a suit collection

Thrifter

Loves her friends

Dog person (secretly)

Quotes niche memes

Kinky af

Middle Child

Lesbian

Y/N Y/L/N (FC: Chrissy Costanza)

@thisbeyn/@reginaslefttit (she/he/they/it)

2/3 Terror Trio

2/2 Golden Retriever duo

Has matching fried egg tattoo with Aaron.

Co-Founder of Stuntmares

"Hi, I'm Y/N and welcome to Stuntmares" *jumps off roof into pool*

Cuts her own hair

Blooper Reel Queen

North Shore's resident stoner

AUDHD (autistic + ADHD)

Playlists range from Beethoven to ashnikko

"IT'S NOT A PHASE. IT'S A LIFESTYLE."

Demisexual

Plays electric guitar

Has slight speech impediment

Gremlin of the group

D&D Dungeon Master

ALWAYS falls asleep during movie night

Power Nap Addict™️

Insomniac

Monster Energy Drink Enthusiast (collects the cans)

Oddly good at Origami

Tweets everything she thinks

Has been banned from Fortnite and Roblox

Married to Gretchen on The Sims (regina and karen were sad)

Anger issues

✨Spicy✨ Latina (do not fuck with her people)

Matching rings with her gfs

Def had one night stand with Cady

Shane Oman

@shaneomann/@omantastic (he/him) or (dumb/hoe)

Loves Old School Rap (Biggie, Tupac, Snoop Dogg, etc.)

Hates Y/N at first but comes to love her like a sister.

Only person who can outsmoke Y/N.

Has a dropped truck with red LED lights under it.

Blasts music walking down the halls.

Always has the zoomies.

Orange cat friend.

Has elevator music playing in his head 24/7.

Challenged Damian to a dance off. (He lost. But he had girls simping over him)

Posts thirst traps on TikTok. (Regina's mom is his #1 follower)

Has a frying pan tattooed to match Aaron and Y/N.

Always on Stuntmares trying to create new world records.

Or eating a bunch of weird combos.

"Oman! Not again!" *proceeds to eat a marshmallow and spam sandwich*

Ralph Lauren man

Whenever the polycule argues, he's a "fuck this shit, I'm out" person.

Professional party crasher

Dine and Dash expert

Has nipple piercings (Aaron and Y/N dared him to get them)

Curses like a fucking sailor (Half of his lines on Stuntmares are just censor beeps)

Talks way too fast.

Knows Italian and Spanish (Him and Y/N talk shit in Spanish)

His ringtone for Aaron and Y/N is the remix of the Windows error sound

Loves t-shirts with offensive prints (Regina tries to make him dress normally)

Has gc with Aaron and Y/N called "Hoemies"

Would fuck Aaron

TICKLISH

Major gossip (Him and Gretchen meet once a week to talk shit)

[aggro-my-beloved]

guy is the type of aggressive lactose-intolerant where he will shit his pants at the mention of milk. and honey loves ice cream. send tweet.

[mamawasatesttube]

Ouuugh so many good options, i suppose 9 or 15 for the prompts

9. "It will be better in the morning."

"I've decided," Tim announces, "that I have a cure for nightmares."

He doesn't look like he's in much of a position to be announcing any kind of breakthrough; he's swaddled in a throw blanket and curled up against Kon's chest, his hair impressively disheveled and his cheeks still a little blotchy from tears. He kind of reminds Kon of one of those baby chicks that've just hatched and are mad about it, with the barely-dried downy fuzz sticking every which way. The yellow lamplight glimmers in his eyes as he peeps up at Kon's face, expectant.

Kon hums. Purrs louder as he keeps rocking the recliner back and forth, slow and gentle. "Is it drinking your hot chocolate and listening to Car Talk until you fall back asleep?"

Tim scoffs. "No." He pauses, wrinkling his nose a little. "I mean. I'll drink the hot chocolate, since you made it for me and all. But no. I'm simply never gonna sleep ever again. Foolproof."

Kon snorts, scrunching his hand through Tim's hair. Tim takes a soft breath, only a little shaky, and then smushes his face into the crook of Kon's neck again. His breath tickles a little against Kon's skin.

"Babe," Kon says. "Sorry to break it to you, but you literally fall asleep on me every single movie night. You're, like, the archetypical dad from every single tweet about dads who fall asleep five minutes into movies. And you aren't even an actual dad."

Tim huffs, a tiny puff of token offense. "I could change." His fingers curl into Kon's shirt. "Can't have a flashback in your sleep if you never sleep again."

"Yeah, you'll just start having sleep deprivation hallucinations." Kon kisses the top of his head. It's late enough it's almost early; he stifles a yawn. The last thing he wants is for Tim to feel guiltier than he already does for keeping him up. "Besides, you love sleeping."

Tim heaves a great, despondent sigh. "I do love sleeping," he admits, a little morose. "Sucks when sleeping doesn't love me back."

"I love you back," Kon coos.

He can feel Tim's lips quirk into a tiny smile against his collarbone. "You're such a giant cheese," Tim mumbles. He doesn't say it back, not with words, but the brush of his lips in the tiniest whisper of a kiss tells Kon everything loud and clear.

Kon purrs a little harder. He likes having Tim here, bundled up in his arms. Likes knowing he makes him feel safer. Likes that he can make him smile after he woke up screaming. "Too bad you're lactose intolerant, huh?"

"I already took my Lactaid to drink the hot chocolate, so shut up." Kon just knows he's rolling his eyes.

"Speaking of which, it's probably a good temperature now," Kon says, and wraps his TTK around the mug to float it over from the side table. "Here."

Tim's hands creep out of the throw blanket to wrap around the mug. He shifts in Kon's arms and sighs again, sitting up to take a tiny sip. His face already looks a little better, cheeks a little less flushed. "Mm. Yeah," he agrees. "...Thanks."

"Always." Kon gives him a gentle squeeze. "Drink up, and then we can just chill before we go back to bed. It'll be better in the morning."

"Mn." Tim makes a noncommittal noise. But he does keep sipping his hot chocolate, and his heart rate is a lot closer to baseline than it was a little while ago. "Guess so."

He twists in Kon's arms suddenly, cups Kon's jaw in one hand, and kisses him. Kon melts like sugar in the rain, the way he always does when Tim kisses him. Tim's lips are a little chapped. He tastes of cocoa and marshmallow fluff.

Tim breaks that kiss, then bumps his nose against Kon's, a silent gesture of gratitude. He blinks at him once, then goes back to his hot chocolate.

Kon smiles and holds him just a bit tighter. The marshmallows on Tim's mouth are definitely sweet, but he can think of something sweeter.

[supernaturalconvert]

Too little too late

Apologies for linking this with the fandom but this fandom and the time I’ve spent here has been a great insight for me when it comes to perhaps some part of the American society mindset.

These are my two cents and I may not be entirely right but I wanted to share my perspective as a non-American simply coz I have tried to speak very openly about everything and this has definitely impacted and affected me as well.

I’ve seen so much intolerance and misinformation in this fandom with labels thrown around a guy who was none of those things. The wildest thing about that was many of these people knew he was none of those things or even if they disagreed with his phrasing they were well aware of his intentions but still called him those names and tried to twist it in the most ugly stories possible. They bullied him and wished ill against him even at his lowest times. You know what that represented, a serious lack of empathy and engaging with someone as a human being.

Another thing that was surprising was that after they did all that they somehow saw themselves as the GOOD GUYS saying things like that this person who has been so open about his struggles in life deserved to be treated this horribly. A guy who was treated unfairly by a colleague was somehow in the wrong for being treated like that. Victim blaming essentially.

At the same time, there was this guy below who is talking about hatefulness here perpetuating this at every opportunity he got. Lies and half truths were his weapons for a supposed friend.

I am sorry Misha but you have been a bully in real life and even if I want to support some of your messages (I support Palestine which he doesn’t) I cannot support you as it’s messanger since you and many of your followers are beacons of hypocrisy who don’t practice what you preach and are very much not the good guys.

I am in no way saying that one person’s treatment is anyway equal to an election result but I am merely commenting on the symbolic behavior that was exhibited by some of these people in a smaller microcosm.

Disclaimer: I am non political when it comes to American politics. I was simply talking about the word hatefulness that he has used in above tweet as he has perpetuated it as well.

[thistledropkick]

I wrote about Douki and Desperado's history here, and these tweets tie into that history. Roughly three years after Douki utterly lost to Kasai at a Taka Taichi show and then Kasai broke Desperado's jaw when Desperado tried to get revenge, Douki and Despe teamed up to fight Kasai and ex-deathmatch wrestler Honma at Taka Taichi Mania 2.5.

Douki tweeted this before the show. At this point in time, Douki had a pretty poor record in NJPW matches, tended to take the pins in Suzuki Gun tag matches, and was generally frustrated by his lack of results. He and Desperado also had very different results when wrestling Kasai up to this point - Desperado had two draws against Kasai, while Douki had one crushing loss.

I translated this somewhat literally, so I want to add some translation notes. There are some expressions that are common in Japanese (especially in wrestling) that come from dog fighting. The term for "a loser" is 負け犬 literally "a losing dog." You'll also see the term 噛ませ犬 "bait dog" used, to describe a wrestler who functions only to get their opponent riled up, built their confidence by losing, or make them look strong in comparison. This is a term that has a very long history of usage in pro wrestling contexts.

Also, while in Mexico, Douki was a member of Los Perros Del Mal "The Dogs of Evil" which can lead to him and to others using dog-related expressions when talking to or about him. (Sometimes you'll see these translated to "bitch" in official translations to maintain the dog-related pun and get the general feeling across.)

Douki:

Taka Taichi Mania is finally tomorrow

After 3 years, a chance for revenge and I'll be tagging with my hermano

I'll vent my feelings about everything, including the interview, in my own way

I absolutely won't be just a bait dog

-

Their team would go on to lose this match, with Douki being the one to take the pin from Kasai.

-

Douki:

Three years, and nothing has changed I was nothing but a bait dog

It's mortifying Intolerably mortifying

How could it end like this

Despe:

"A bait dog" huh

If you really think Taichi was thinking that when he booked you for that match, maybe that is all you are

Douki:

I worded it poorly

To be so enthusiastic for that match, and then completely lose - it was just so frustrating

I was blessed by the opportunity to wrestle in that match

I'm grateful to my partner, my opponents, and to my hermano

But next time, I will absolutely get results It won't end like this

Despe:

Does losing to someone strong make you a "bait dog"?

Is Kasai Jun someone who needs a "bait dog"?

Choose your words more carefully from now on